- 11 comments
To be a parent is to always feel like you could have done better. That being said some fails are just funny. As I was raising a smart only child who had time to herself at home as a latch-key child, I took to hiding her holiday presents in various places around the house and retrieving them in time to give them to her at the appropriate time. Unfortunately, my own memory wasn't always up to par. I often found myself pulling something out of a closet or drawer and saying "Look what the Easter Bunny (or Santa) dropped on the way into the house."
My daughter and I talked about this when she was an adult, and she swears she was never fooled. I guess she gets the good sport award!
Hmmm...my most epic fail? I'm not sure that I have one yet. Don't get me wrong, I'm far from perfect but I have a feeling I'll find out what my biggest embarrassments or shortcomings were as a parent when my kids invite me to their first therapy session one day. The best I can do for now would be to share the time we left our son D in a stroller by himself after we'd finished the birthday pinata for E at the park. Luckily my husband's cousin and girlfriend wheeled him over shortly after. Oops!
An epic 3am meltdown in my underwear after stepping in a minefield of Legos. Those things are like plastic razors.
Wearing my “Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good (and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too)” t-shirt to a parent teacher conference we called about his math IEP
I feel as if not listening or letting your child finish their sentences before yelling at them and accusing them of lying or some other nonsense, is the biggest parenting fail. If there was less interrupting my my house while I was growing up, it would have been a much calmer environment.
I can think of lots of small things I probably didn’t handle well. And so once again, I had to ask my oldest daughter. There’s something fun to do – ask your kid when you failed! At any rate, she reminded me of a really scary situation that even she remembers.
We were on the beach in Florida – there on a big trip to Disney World – and we had the three kids – baby, 6 and 9 year old. We came upon this really cool sand castle event – in action and it was fascinating. We all watched them build these things… Only some of us decided looking for seashells would be more fun. Or one of us, rather: the six year old. And that is how it happened we watched sand castle building just a little too long and off one kid went down the beach. Then it was “where is he?” “Wasn’t he with you?” “Wasn’t he right here?” And then it was sheer panic. Running everywhere and lots of upset. We told a lifeguard and suddenly we had a whole team of people helping us look for him. But he was nowhere. And time kept moving forward. The lifeguard was about to call for a helicopter search when suddenly we see a woman walking up to all of us holding the hand of one small boy. “Is he yours?” God, what a relief and what a bundle of emotions it all was. Everything from panic worry and fear to relief and guilt.
I would love nothing more than to join in a conversation about all the times I’ve messed up as a parent. And there are some good stories. But honestly – even under this anonymity – I don’t feel safe. Compassion and understanding for the foibles you experience as a parent can go right out the door if you divorce. To this day I feel like my ex would use anything and everything against me. And he did. Experiences from the past came back to bite me as I went through divorce. Of course now, on the other side of it, I do have my close friends I confide in.
Showing up to parent visitation day in my daughter's classroom a day late. As if she need another reason to perform an eye roll.
I guess my biggest parenting fail occurred when my daughter hurt her knee. It was swollen and she couldn't put any weight on it but she had not done a thing to injure it. She was standing there, felt a pain and fell to the ground. The next morning, she could put some weight on it but not bend so I thought it was improving. I made her wait 4 days before going to the doctor, and even then it was an appointment already scheduled for her annual check up. I told her to wear sweat pants so we could "mention her knee' to the doctor. As we were leaving, I remembered-- and said 'oh she hurt her knee on Saturday...' the doc took one look and said 'you need to get her to the orthopedist today.' Yep, torn ligament, chipped bone and cartilage. Mom of the year, right here. :)
I took my son, then 5 months old, to a first birthday party of a friend's son. Within the first hour, he pooped through his whole outfit and on to my shirt. I forgot to bring extra clothes for either of us so he went the rest of the day in just a diaper and I had to borrow a shirt from the mother of the birthday boy. Sweet planning, Mom!
My biggest fail was not being actively aware of what was happening at school and intervening sooner. I would go to meetings and be told that everything was fine only to find out that my child was doing inhouse suspensions or on lunchroom cleanup almost daily. When I questioned this I could not get an answer as to why this was happening other than it was a piunishment for inappropriate behavior. Finally I ended up filing a complaint against the school district and having my child moved to a different school where he is thriving. Never settle for what the school is telling you without investigating it thouroughly. There are options out there and the ombudsman at the state superintendents office can really help and direct you.